Tuesday, 24 February 2015

Return Of The Blog

Image result for uk light bulbs 40w
Come back, all is forgiven.

Hello! I'm back! Did you miss me?

What's that? You didn't even notice I'd gone? Charming...

Actually I haven't been gone that long. Just over two months in fact, which is not a lot in the grand scheme of things. I went four years without a blog post at one point. So where have I been? Well, just here actually, working intensively on my latest novel, to the exclusion of all else, hence no blog posts. However, it is now finished and with the proof readers which means normal service can be resumed here.

I did leave our old friend Gerald Mincen in charge of the blog whilst I was busy, with instructions to write a post every week. However, he seems to have only written one and then not bothered. I haven't actually seen him for a few weeks, as he mysteriously disappeared after going on a tour of a crisp factory in Leicester. It seems he signed in but never signed out. He was last seen leaning over a vat of hot oil, ready to fry up the latest batch of Roast Chicken flavour which has led some to fear the worst, but if I know Gerald, he's probably holed himself up somewhere in the factory, emerging only in the dead of night for a feast.

Anyway, now I'm back, we can get on with the serious business of writing amusing blog posts without making it too blatantly obvious that I'm plugging my books. So today, a quick rant on the subject of light bulbs, which have nothing to do whatsoever with exciting time travel based fiction.

I am bloody annoyed me. About light bulbs, that is. Remember the good old cheap ones we used to buy? Four for a pound? The ones that the powers that be decided we weren't allowed to use any more because they were bad for the environment. Fair enough, we all have to do our bit to save the planet, but what annoys me is the blatant lie about the wonderful new bulbs that was fabricated to placate us.

Never mind that instead of paying £1 for four bulbs, you are now paying £4 for one. These ultra-efficient new beasties not only use less electricity but they last for up to five years - each. So you're getting value for money - right?

Wrong. The new bulbs as far as I can see don't last any longer than the old ones did. I am bloody fed up with changing the damned things. I had to change three yesterday, can you believe? And one of those I only changed a couple of months ago. They don't last any longer than the old ones did and some of them take ages to "warm up". What's that all about? I turn the lights on in the living room, and peer through the gloom trying to make my way through the room without tripping over anything. Eventually after about five minutes they've reached their full level of illumination, by which time I've buggered off elsewhere. If I'd wanted dimmer switches, I'd have installed them.

So, if I could travel back in time, I think I'd go back and stock up on the old bulbs before they disappeared. At least I knew where I was with them. And on this environmentally unfriendly note, I shall depart, but I will be back later with news on the new book.


Jason's new novel, My Tomorrow, Your Yesterday, will be released in March 2015.

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